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better than I would've thought
Joel went back to Amsterdam yesterday to finish cleaning the apartment (when we left on Tuesday, we had almost all of our stuff out, but wow was there a lot of cat hair...6 years worth in some nooks and crannies!), go to the PhD defense party of a friend that evening, spend the night, and come back today. Cleaning apparently took more time than planned, since I last heard from him around 7:30pm and he was still working on the kitchen, so it'll probably be pretty late before he gets back. Before anything else, let me say here and now that I am so grateful that he's doing this. Even in the best of circumstances, cleaning an apartment after moving out is just something I'm not very good at, because my level of cleanliness is not as high as it needs to be, and I just find it irritating. So I am so glad and thankful that he was willing to take all this on by himself.
I've been surprised at how well we've gotten along yesterday and today on our own. I did manage to do some unpacking yesterday, but not much, and today almost none -- though I have done two loads of laundry and kept up with the dishes, and managed to eat 5 real meals (even though one of them involved ordering in pizza and Ben & Jerry's...I figured that was better than nothing!) -- and instead Gwen and I have spent a lot of time hanging out in the bedroom and cuddling. She hasn't been sleeping as well in her basket the last few days; she doesn't appear to be sleeping as deeply and is a lot more vocal. So there's been a lot of sleeping in my lap and sleeping on my chest, and I've found it very relaxing to just sit and hold her. In this quiet and peaceful and relaxed setting we've tried nursing again a couple of times, all of which have resulted in a few half-hearted attempts to latch which quickly end in tears of frustration on her part. I'll be seeing lactation consultant #3 tomorrow morning, and this time she's coming here rather than me going there, which I'm hoping will help in terms of getting practical advice for my precise situation -- we can try out all of the chairs and pillows, etc., that I have until we find a combination that works. I hope. Pumping output is now down to less than 5ml per session, so at this point she's basically wholly on formula.
It also helped some that Joel was gone for the night, because then when she was awake and fussy at night, I didn't worry about her disturbing his sleep. Instead, I could just do whatever I needed to do to calm her down. I also didn't sleep particularly well myself last night either (two nights ago I was SO COLD all night long; so cold that I slept all curled up and when I woke in the morning my legs hurt like crazy from being so tight and taut for so long. Last night, I was SO HOT that at one point I took off the t-shirt I was wearing because it was damp with sweat, eew), so we basically spent the night trying to be comfortable rather than trying to sleep, which was easier to do than it would've been if there'd been a third person trying to sleep in the same room (or even in the same house). That's part of the reason why I didn't do any unpacking today, but rather spent most of it just relaxing in bed.
I still wish she'd sleep as well at night as she does during the day. She last ate around 4:30 and then fell asleep while I was burping her and amazingly didn't wake up when I put her into her basket. Around 7:00 she started yummering and I made a bottle, though I didn't expect her to be hungry yet, but by the time we got back upstairs she was asleep again, and she's continued sleeping for the last two hours on my chest. Why can't we get these four hour stretches at night?? We pretty routinely get 2.5 between when we're both back asleep after a feeding and when she wakes up next. Not so fun.
Here's hoping that Joel gets home before it's too late, and that tomorrow's meeting with the lactation consultant brings any measure of success.
I've been surprised at how well we've gotten along yesterday and today on our own. I did manage to do some unpacking yesterday, but not much, and today almost none -- though I have done two loads of laundry and kept up with the dishes, and managed to eat 5 real meals (even though one of them involved ordering in pizza and Ben & Jerry's...I figured that was better than nothing!) -- and instead Gwen and I have spent a lot of time hanging out in the bedroom and cuddling. She hasn't been sleeping as well in her basket the last few days; she doesn't appear to be sleeping as deeply and is a lot more vocal. So there's been a lot of sleeping in my lap and sleeping on my chest, and I've found it very relaxing to just sit and hold her. In this quiet and peaceful and relaxed setting we've tried nursing again a couple of times, all of which have resulted in a few half-hearted attempts to latch which quickly end in tears of frustration on her part. I'll be seeing lactation consultant #3 tomorrow morning, and this time she's coming here rather than me going there, which I'm hoping will help in terms of getting practical advice for my precise situation -- we can try out all of the chairs and pillows, etc., that I have until we find a combination that works. I hope. Pumping output is now down to less than 5ml per session, so at this point she's basically wholly on formula.
It also helped some that Joel was gone for the night, because then when she was awake and fussy at night, I didn't worry about her disturbing his sleep. Instead, I could just do whatever I needed to do to calm her down. I also didn't sleep particularly well myself last night either (two nights ago I was SO COLD all night long; so cold that I slept all curled up and when I woke in the morning my legs hurt like crazy from being so tight and taut for so long. Last night, I was SO HOT that at one point I took off the t-shirt I was wearing because it was damp with sweat, eew), so we basically spent the night trying to be comfortable rather than trying to sleep, which was easier to do than it would've been if there'd been a third person trying to sleep in the same room (or even in the same house). That's part of the reason why I didn't do any unpacking today, but rather spent most of it just relaxing in bed.
I still wish she'd sleep as well at night as she does during the day. She last ate around 4:30 and then fell asleep while I was burping her and amazingly didn't wake up when I put her into her basket. Around 7:00 she started yummering and I made a bottle, though I didn't expect her to be hungry yet, but by the time we got back upstairs she was asleep again, and she's continued sleeping for the last two hours on my chest. Why can't we get these four hour stretches at night?? We pretty routinely get 2.5 between when we're both back asleep after a feeding and when she wakes up next. Not so fun.
Here's hoping that Joel gets home before it's too late, and that tomorrow's meeting with the lactation consultant brings any measure of success.